Tuesday, December 20, 2011

When I Couldn't Pray

I told you last week that we had a court date coming up for our foster children.

I also mentioned that this was a pretty pivotal hearing.

To be a little more specific it was a hearing to terminate birth mom's rights.

My way of handling stressful situations like that is outward calm with lots of inner turmoil. (and stomach ulcers )

Our social worker had warned us that termination hearing's are usually quite long 4-5 hours or more--so we were heavily fortified with prayer, and some "clench-jawed" determination.

What we weren't prepared for was the animosity from the birth family toward us.

I guess it makes sense--we have their children--hence we are the villains.

It doesn't make it easy to deal with though.

The hallway that we were waiting in prior to the hearing was filled with a lot of profanity, and angry comments--all directed at us.

I was stressed out enough that I couldn't even get my thoughts together to form a prayer in my mind.

I tried repeatedly, and finally gave up--hoping that

someone

somewhere

was praying for us.

As we were preparing to enter the court room I felt almost opressed--I wondered how I was going to survive 4-5 hours of this.

We found our seats, and an odd feeling of calm surrounded me.

I felt almost peaceful.

I felt protected.

Like SOMEONE had put their arms around me.

The feeling lasted through the entire trial.

Which, by the way, only lasted  45 MINUTES!!

Later when I told my friend about this she asked when the hearing had started.

I told her it was almost an hour later than scheduled.

She chuckled and said,

"I looked at the clock--thought you were an hour into it, and prayed you would feel God's presence."