Friday, May 25, 2012

To Do It Well

When we first started our foster parenting journey I had some preconcieved notions of how things worked. 

I had observed other foster parents who seemed to parent these little ones effortlessly, and I wanted desperately for our home to be a safe and happy place for those who came there.

I never wanted to have a "us" and "them" mentality.  I wanted our family to be one unit that flowed seemlessly from foster children to adopted children.

I've worked hard at this, and for the most part it has been a sucess.

In the past several weeks though--I've come to a realization.

There has to be a solid and healthy "us" for us to take care of and minister to "them."

My children need to be secure in the awareness that foster children may come and go, but they will always stay.

Because of this there are things that I need to do for my children that I might not be able to do for the foster children in our home.

There are words that I can't say to my foster babies--words like forever or always.

This in no way means that I show favoritism to "my children" by buying them special things, or toys, or letting them get away with disobedience or wrong behaivior.

I'm really talking more about the emotional side of our relationship.

I know that there are a few foster mom's that read my blog, and I would like to hear how you handle this.