Of All The Things I've Lost.......

........I miss my mind the most.

I've become so scatterbrained lately.

It seems like I'm always thinking about two things--what I'm actually doing, and what I should do next.

I fill out important paperwork, and then can't remember where I put it.

I accomplish some chore, and then lay in bed at night trying desperately to remember if I actually did it.

I start to tell my husband a funny story, and half-way through it I forget what I was talking about.

I notice that someone needs their diaper changed, and then forget to do it. (Thankfully everyone else it the house reminds me, or they might never get their diaper changed.)

I was feeling rather depressed about the state of my mind, and pondering what I could do about it, but I got distracted by a wayward toddler, and after caring for him I couldn't remember what I was depressed about.

I guess losing your mind has some good points after all.

Sleeping?

There were people sleeping all over our house last night.(No pigs--I just liked the picture.)

Unfortunately, most of them were not in their own beds.

At least one of them was in MY bed. (scowl)

I got up this morning and it looked like we had a slumber party.

Children sacked out on the couch, and the futon and the floor.

When I asked them why--none of them could answer me.

Except to say they didn't sleep good.

Funny thing is--I didn't sleep that well either.

Thanksgiving Quote

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them."              

  ~John F. Kennedy

Thanksgiving Memories

Thanksgiving always makes me feel rather nostalgic. ( Actually most holidays do, but currently Thanksgiving is on my mind.)

Here's a few of my favorite Thanksgiving memories.

Remembering the smell of turkey and stuffing that always permeated my grandma's house on Thanksgiving Day.

One year we had Thanksgiving at my Aunt and Uncle's house about 2 hours away from home.  In the afternoon it started snowing, and by the time we headed home it was almost blizzard conditions.  We crept along the highway and cars were sliding in the ditch all around us.

I remember waking up in the wee hours of the morning and hearing the oven door squeak as my mom put the turkey in the oven.  Somehow that sound made me feel cozy and safe.

We found out seven years ago on the day before Thanksgiving that we would be able to adopt our second son.  I cried my thanksgiving over and over that year. 

Now that I've had Thanksgiving dinner at my house a few times I realize how much work goes into a Thanksgiving dinner.  Makes me thankful when I'm invited somewhere else for Thanksgiving. :)

What are some of your favorite Thanksgiving memories?

Adjusting

Someone asked in the comments how our adjustment to foster parenting has gone.  Since we've never done this before I really have nothing to compare it to, but I'll do my best.

Probably the hardest thing has been some sleep issues.  For the first seven weeks they were here the baby got up every three hours like a newborn.  That was pretty rough. 

I can catch myself over-analyzing our family.  I hear a little squabble and I panic over how my adopted children are not "accepting" the foster kids.  Then I realize ALL children squabble, and ALL families have a certain amount of spatting back and forth.  If they were sweet to each other all the time it wouldn't be real.

I've had to adjust to cooking more, or at least having less left-overs.  These little guys can EAT!  A 9x13 pan of food no longer makes two meals for us.

All-in-all though these children are just normal little people.  Granted they've been through a lot in their short little lives, but they and we have adjusted well. 

They came with no guarantees, and there are lots of unknowns in their future, but last time I checked no child is born with guarantees.

I think most parents would admit that parenting has thrown them a few curve balls, and foster parenting is no exception to this rule.

Basically none of us has the promise that tomorrow will be perfect, or that there are not unseen challenges waiting for us around the bend.

We do have the promise that we don't have to face any adjustments or challenges alone.

"Lo, I am with you always." Matthew 28:20

Of Boys and Football

Football is the current game of choice in our house.


Only it's not your typical tackle football.


It's indoor football.


With a pillow pet for a football.


There is no age limit--I know this because the 15month old just waddled past me clutching the "football", and chuckling gleefully.

The two year old mostly just yells "hut, hut" at the top of his lungs, and when the ball is passed to him he flings it skyward in a random sort of way.

There is lots of crashing, and rolling on the floor.

A few cries of "that's not how you're supposed to play."

And a loud boyish boistrousness that surrounds the whole game.

The noise bothers me a little.

The crashing and rolling worries me some.

But I've decided to ignore it.

After all---boys will be boys.

Drowning In Clothes

Lately I've been a little overwhelmed with clothing.  Don't get me wrong--I'm thankful that we have clothes, but sometimes I think we have too many.

My 9 and 7 year old boys have approximately 10 "every day" shirts each.  However they only like about 3 or 4 of them.  (Who knew that boys were that particular about clothes.)  Anyway, they shuffle through their stacks of shirts and some fall on the floor and some get wadded up in the back of their dresser, and the result is a very crabby mommy--when she puts clean laundry away.

So..............yesterday I put my foot down.  I even told them I was putting my foot down.  They looked a little nervous, but till it was all said and done I think they like the new system.

I pulled all their clothes out of their cupboard/dresser.  I was washing their clothes yesterday--so I did this as I was folding the clean clothes.  I sorted through them and saved out six or seven pairs of pants, and the same number of shirts--making sure that it included their "favorites".

 Next I paired them together.  Instead of having a stack of shirts, and a stack of pants I now had one stack of outfits.  This wasn't hard to do because they mostly wear blue jeans, and so all their pants are interchangeable with all their shirts.  Now they can pull a pair of pants, and a shirt out of their cupboard with very little effort.

There were no extra pants, but the extra shirts I plan to pass on to another family, or give to Goodwill.  I've come to the conclusion that too many clothes do not make my life simpler.  I do laundry several times a week--so this should not be a problem.

I'm curious, how do other moms handle the clothing monster?  Am I being ridiculous to think my children only need 5 or 6 outfits each?

November Is National Adoption Month

Please take the time to watch this--it's powerful!

How Embarrassing

I usually do my grocery shopping in the evenings after my husband is home.  Each of the children take turns going along with me, and it's always a fun time of connecting with whoever goes along.

Last night after we finished an early supper I headed out into the rainy night with my second child in tow.  I hurried out the door making sure I had my list, my wallet, and the van keys.  I was feeling extra organized, and happy over all the things I had accomplished that day.

Once we arrived at the grocery store I breezed through my shopping while chatting with my son.  There were some good sales on items I needed and I quickly filled my cart. 

As I was hurrying up to the checkout counter I reached for my purse to ready my debit card for a quick swipe.  I scrabbled through my purse in dismay as I realized that I had left the debit card AT HOME. 

Thoroughly humiliated I explained my plight to the checkout clerk, and asked if I could set my cart aside and run home to retrieve the card.  I mumbled something about my foggy brain, and my son loudly agreed.  "She forgets everything!"  he announced grinning widely.

How embarrassing!!

I totally deserve this outspoken son of mine.  I was the child in my family who blabbed secrets to everyone, and talked when I should have remained silent. 

Being on the receiving end of a child's painful honesty stings a little though.

Quiet Time

One of the things that I long for as a mom--is quiet.

I mean silence.

Where there is no noise except the faucet dripping.

With six people living in our home it is very rarely quiet.

Sometimes I get so focused on moving from one activity to the next.

That I forget that we ALL need "down time."

We like each other better after we have all been still for a while each day.

My younger foster babies take naps.

My older boys look at books, or rest quietly.

I sometimes just sit and do nothing.

Or read blogs. :)

But we all function better with a little quiet each day.

How about your family? 

Do you need quiet time every day?

When In Doubt Shut Your Mouth

I love to talk.

Maybe I've mentioned that before.

However, there are times when it's better to be quiet.

Yes, this post actually has a connection to Friday's post.

The hearing went pretty much exactly as we expected.

Essentially nothing has changed for now.

There are a few little monkey wrenches that have been thrown into the case.

I could worry.........

But I've decided not to.

Back to the subject at hand........or mouth.

Right before the hearing--a member of my foster children's birth family talked to me.

Actually she asked me one question.

I could have blabbed all sorts of information at her.

Some of it useful--most of it not.

I chose instead to simply answer her question.

I have thought of a hundred different things I could have said, but I doubt they would have improved the situation.

The relationship between foster parents, and birth parents is strained at best.

I think keeping my mouth shut was the right thing to do.

Thank you so much for all your prayers!!

The Curve In The Pathway

Sometimes, as a foster parent, it can feel like you live from one court date to the next.

Let me explain.

Typically there is a hearing every three months.

Life can move on in between these hearings.

Babies learn to walk.

Toddlers cut new molars.

Just normal family stuff.

You can forget that everything could change in a moment.

But, in the back of your mind.

It's always there.

The curve in the pathway.

That next court date.

You live with the reality that things could get better for the children in your care.

Or much worse.

Tomorrow is our next court date.

Please pray!

A Deer Hunter's Wife

Around this time of year my husband starts exhibiting some bizarre behavior. 


He peers out our back windows anxiously--scanning the woods in a paranoid sort of way.


He disappears for hours at a time to the sporting goods department of Wally World.


He spends a lot of time polishing his guns with horrid smelling chemicals.


He mutters about how many fat does he saw in the neighbors corn field on his way home from church.


He checks and double checks his ammunition like he is expecting a herd of deer to randomly bound through our yard.


He inquires repeatedly how much extra space is in our deep freeze.


I don't worry too much about it.  After all he has been doing this kind of thing for every year since I've known him.  It's all part of being married to a deer hunter. 

November

N ot many leaves left on the trees.

O ctober and warm days are a distant memory.

V ery brisk wind.

E mpty branches waving their arms.

M any geese flying south.

B ringing thoughts of coming winter.

E ager deer hunters prowling the woods.

R ustling leaves scudding across lawns.

This is what November means to me.  What does November mean to you?